How to prevent premature ejaculation: The Ultimate Guide
One of the biggest problems in men’s mind today is “how to prevent premature ejaculation”. Many men think that they can’t last long in bed and therefore they are bad lovers. What’s worse, most of them actually this problem to be a sickness. They think that there is something physically wrong with them.
According to doctors and other medical experts however, premature ejaculation is psychological in nature in 99 out of 100 cases. This is excellent news for you, because early ejaculation’s physical causes are pretty bad and they include various forms of cancer! In other, simpler terms, your lack of staying power is caused by your head and not your body.
Does this mean that there is no cure or some way to delay ejaculation? Heck, no! It just means that as far as this problem is concerned, you should stop focusing on your body and focus on your mind instead. It all begins and ends there.
A problem caused by misconceptions
They say that in order to solve a problem, you first need to get to its roots. If you find that you are ejaculating too early, then you probably don’t understand sex. By that I don’t mean that you are not a good lover. I mean that you haven’t put much though in what sex is and how it works. Understanding sex, is the first step in locating the root of the problem and becoming able to achieve delayed ejaculation.
PE is absolutely natural!
When you experience PE, your body works EXACTLY how nature intended it to! Let’s get one thing straight: sex might be fun and all, but as far as nature is concerned, it is a tool. Nature pretty much has the same position as your pastor regarding sex: it is only for reproduction. This is why men and dolphins are the only animals that have sex for pleasure.
So, taking into consideration what was said above, the fact that you cum fast, is not a problem as far as your body and nature are concerned. Sex is a pretty risky business in nature. Male big cats, spiders and other animals essentially risk their lives when they have sex, because their partners are almost never into it. That’s why pretty much every male is hard-wired to “carry out his business” with the female of the species as fast as possible.
The faster you get done, the less chances you have of getting killed by the female and the more chances you have of getting on with ANOTHER female, multiplying the chances of passing on your genes. So in nature’s view, asking how to prevent premature ejaculation is like asking how to get yourself killed or how to make your species go extinct faster.
Humans of course don’t risk getting killed while having sex and they mostly do it for fun. Nature doesn’t care about that though. It’s up to you to overcome that “programming” or find ways around it.
The problem with human nature
Nature is not the only cause of problems related to ejaculating too early though. Another big cause and very important cause is male competition. You see us men, we are competitive by nature. This is because like most male animals, we are hard-wired to think that females will prefer the strongest or the best as a sexual partner.
If we find out that a man is good at something, we have to become better. Most of us see the ridiculous (and totally fake and fabricated) stamina of porn stars and think that we should be able to do better. We hear or read stories about men capable of delaying their ejaculation for hours and we thing that we could and SHOULD do better than them.
Believe it or not, when we pressure ourselves to last longer in bed and to reach some ridiculous “performance benchmark”, we are setting up ourselves for failure. Why? Because we cause ourselves a great deal of anxiety and our bodies don’t like anxiety. In simpler terms, by constantly worrying about how to stop premature ejaculation, we are essentially causing it!
So, now that we know the cause of premature ejaculation, how do we go about solving it? Well, that what this guide is for! Let’s get started!
See a doctor!
I know that I earlier said that ejaculating early is rarely caused by a physical condition and even more rarely by one that is not serious. That still stands. There is however a psychosomatic condition that can cause PE and it is actually fairly common: depression!
What is depression?
Most of us thing that being depressed or suffering from depression means that you are sad all the time. If someone is really sad, we say that he is depressed. This means that it is a psychological state or problem, right? Wrong! Dead wrong to be exact!
Depression is a disease. It is caused by a chemical imbalance in the body. In other words, when we say that someone suffers from depression, it means that his body isn’t producing the amounts of Serotonin and of other substances that it should. As a result, to put it in layman’s terms, this person is INCAPABLE of feeling pleasure or of feeling happiness.
This means that people suffering from depression don’t just need to think happy thoughts or to get a more positive outlook on life in order to get cured of their condition. They need to get their serotonin levels up to par and this can only be done through drugs.
•How does depression affect my staying power?
Serotonin is released during sex. If the Serotonin levels in your system are low, then you won’t feel great amounts of pleasure during sex. This lack of pleasure, will make your body switch to its “reproduction mode” ie, it will make it want to conduct business as fast as possible. Your natural hardwiring will take over.
Visiting a doctor, talking about your problem and getting examined, is the essential first step in the journey to achieving delayed ejaculation. Your doctor will either give you a clean bill of health – which will mean that you will have to overcome the problem on your own, but I’m here to help with that – or he will tell you what is wrong with you.
Barring the really bad and rare causes, he will probably inform you about imbalances in your system and prescribe pills to take before sex to remedy them and make it last longer. This is a simple and gentle way that you have a minor case of depression. Which is something that can interfere with your sexual performance, but you shouldn’t worry too much about it in general.
It goes without saying that your doctor will help you treat depression and get your system back in check as soon as possible.
It goes without saying that even if you receive a “clean bill of health”, you should ask your doctor about ways that can help you last longer in bed. Also talk to him about any medication that you are currently on, since that could be the cause of problem.
So, you just visited your doctor and you were told that there’s nothing physically wrong with you. Now what? Now we get to the real meat and potatoes of this guide!
The key to not ejaculating too early could lie in your fitness levels. Simply put, non-fit men are known to cum faster than fit men. Why is that though?
The answer is simple: fatigue. When you get tired, your heart rate and your breathing get shallower and faster. Your body goes on overdrive and it is essentially about to explode. You are pushing yourself too fast and your body is trying to keep you from going over the edge by essentially getting as close to shutting down as possible.
Sex is a form of exercise and a very demanding one at that. So, the faster you get tired, the quicker your body will want to pull you out of there, in order to keep you from collapsing. You don’t have to be exhausted mind you. If your breathing and heart rate gets too fast too soon while having sex, your body will “pull the plug” by ejaculating.
•Do some cardio
Cardio workouts are great for building stamina. They are really simple too! Power walking, jogging and running are essential cardio exercises. Just stop using your car too much and try to work or better yet, run to some destinations.
Start with short workouts and increase their duration with time. You don’t have to join a gym and you don’t have to become Arnold Schwarzenegger in order to achieve ejaculation delay in bed. You just need to not become tired too quickly.
Just visit the local gym and ask for a good cardio workout routine. You can also look online for suggestions, but a workout routine created by a professional especially for you and your needs is the way to go, as far as I am concerned. It’s a great way to treat premature ejaculation naturally and improve your quality of life in general, so get to it, TODAY.
I know what some of you may be thinking right now: “cardio is great and all, but aren’t there any exercises specifically designed to prevent premature ejaculation?”. Well, as it turns it out there is: the famous Kegels workout which consists of pelvic floor exercises!
•What is the Kegels workout and does have it to do with delayed ejaculation?
Dr. Kegels was a famous OBGYN. In his quest to help women deal with incontinence problems and to make childbirth easier and safer, he came up with special pelvic floor exercises. The muscles found on the pelvic floor pretty much control that region. They hold pee in and they push babies out of women.
So, stronger pelvic muscles equal better pee control for both men and women and easier childbirth for women. What do those muscles have to do with controlling male ejaculation? Well, the pelvic muscle found on that pelvic floor, is responsible for ejaculation. It holds it back and it releases it when you reach your climax.
In other words, if you strengthen pelvic muscles you will become able to control it and your ejaculation, by extension. You will be able to flex and relax it, like your arm muscles, for example. Long story short, they are the essential exercises for stopping premature ejaculation.
•So, how do I do those pelvic floor exercises?
1. Locate your pelvic muscle: Sounds complicated, right? Well it isn’t! Go and take and a piss (don’t go now, I can wait!) and try to stop the flow of your pee midstream. Do you feel something flexing inside your pelvis? Congratulations, you just located your pelvic muscle!
2.Sit on a chair and pretend to hold your pee. In other words, just squeeze that muscle you located earlier and keep it tight for about 5 seconds.
3.Loosen the muscle, wait another 10 seconds and repeat the process.
4.Do about ten reps, three times a day. The easier it becomes for you to tighten and keep the muscle tight, the longer each rep should be. Start with 5 seconds, like I said above, and add a couple seconds after a couple of weeks, then add another two after another couple of weeks and so on and so forth.
5.The next time that you have sex and you feel like you are about to cum, just squeeze that muscle as much as you can. Thanks to your stronger pelvic floor, the cum will be held back and you will achieve delayed ejaculation. It goes without saying that you shouldn’t expect results overnight!
All in all, these exercises are one of the best natural ways of achieving better orgasm control.
What if I want to delay ejaculation during sex, TODAY!
Before I ask this question, there is something that we need to be crystal clear on: orgasm control is a long game. This means that it will time to get rid of the problem and get to the “holy grail” that is the ability to last about as much as you want. That being said, there are some ways to achieve delayed ejaculation that you can try any time and without great amounts of training or preparation.
The Masters and Johnson squeeze technique
This is one of the oldest tricks in the book as far as ejaculating on demand goes. It is also rather simple to “perform”:
1.Start having sex and get as close to ejaculation as possible.
2.When you feel like you are about to ejaculate, stop any sexual activity immediately.
3.Take your index and forefinger and place them on the head of the penis and squeeze a bit hard (not too hard, you are not trying to hurt yourself here).
4.Congratulations, you just delayed ejaculation using only your fingers and some willpower!
Simple isn’t? Let’s see some tips for beginners:
Tip #1: Practice by yourself. I strongly you try the squeeze technique while masturbating before trying it out in bed. This way it will come more natural during actual sex and you will get a better and clearer of how and when your excitement “works” and peaks. Some of you may be thinking “hey wat a minute, does masturbation make you last longer in bed?”. That question will be answered in the following section, so be patient.
Tip #2: Get your partner involved. Ejaculation delay will make sex better for both you and your partner. You can spice things up by simply explaining the technique to her and asking her to perform it when you ask her.
Masturbate before sex
We have all asked the question “does jacking off make you last longer in sex” when we were teenagers or in college. The answer is that yes, it can! You just have to know when to do it.
I won’t go into much detail about how your masturbation habits actually effect when you are ejaculating, since this is not aimed at teenagers. If you’re a teenager and you’re reading this, then don’t masturbate all the time! Just do it when you are alone and try to last longer masturbating. Don’t sneak off and rush the job, constantly and your future self will be thanking you.
With that out of the way, let’s say that masturbating before having sex, can actually delay your ejaculation. This is before your body can only produce that much sperm and since sex is all about reproduction, your body has to be efficient. This means that it will delay ejaculation until it has decent amount of semen to release.
The older you get, the more it takes for your body to produce semen and replenish its “stores”. So, the older you are, the more it will take for your body to give the ejaculation command if its “stores are dry”. Just time your masturbation correctly (an hour or so before sex, depending on your age and body) and you will experience a delayed ejaculation.
•Try a new sexual position
Who said that trying to prevent premature ejaculation has to be boring? New sexual positions are a great way to delay your ejaculation. If sex is always the same, then your mind and body will “go through the motions” really quickly. A new position will make them wonder what the hell is going on!
Also note that some positions are more or less perfect for ejaculation delay. Those are positions that put the woman in control like the famous cowgirl and reverse cowgirl positions. Also, keep in mind that the missionary and doggie style positions are the worst for those looking to ejaculate as late as possible.
·Try some less natural ways to prevent premature ejaculation
So far, I have focused on how to deal with and treat premature ejaculation naturally, more or less. Here we’ll have a look at some more “artificial” ways keep you from ejaculating too fast.
There are condoms that claim to be able to help you not cum too quickly. Those are usually known as performance or orgasm control condoms. They look and “work” like regular condoms, but their inside is covered in an analgesic like Novocain. This will reduce the amount of sensations experienced by the penis during intercourse and thus delay the climax.
The downside is that there is a chance that you won’t receive as much pleasure as when using a regular condom. Also, the analgesic may be on the inside, but it still can come in contact with your partner’s genitals and thus make the experience less pleasant for them too.
If you don’t want analgesics on your junk, you can just try to wear a thicker condom. This way you will reduce sensation to the penis, without the intervention of any chemical agent.
2.Numbing creams and delay spray
Those creams also contain analgesics and other numbing agents and they also aim at reducing sensation to the penis. Those will definitely affect your partner’s genitals during intercourse, but they are a lot better at keeping sensations at bay and helping you manage your arousal than the aforementioned condoms.
If you can’t get those creams, just use a spray like those used to make injured athletes feel better. They essentially work the same way.
3.SSRI premature ejaculation pills
Those are essentially pills that regulate Serotonin (we talked about it a bit earlier) that can be used by people not suffering from depression. Usually you can only get them with a prescription, but if you followed this guide and visited a doctor, you probably know that now J.
So, there you have it. You can prevent premature ejaculation, if you really want to. All you need is some willpower and dedication. It’s not going to be fast, or easy. Just persevere, weather the storm and you will succeed. The key is to never feel like you are an incurable case. To never fear that your sex life is over. Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life!